When Boys Will Be Boys….(Regarding Messes, I Mean)

June 28, 2011 By JulieBastuk 3 Comments

Boys…I love them and I’ve got a house full of them. 3 sons, a hubby, and a collie.

All these boys make plenty use of the bathroom, and while my husband has decent bathroom etiquette, my potty trained preschooler and not yet potty trained toddler make plenty of messes, generously covering the floor and toilet with pee through various methods.

My “potty trained” infant also periodically offers his own libation when I’m holding him over the potty and, failing to get him angled correctly, his “you know what” resembles more of a high pressure water hose than a “you know what.”

Needless to say, all of this pee gets stinky. And is generally nasty.

I have scrubbed and scrubbed, wiped, sprayed, disinfected…you name it and for the life of me I could not get of lingering pee smells. It was driving me nuts.

But then….with the help of some other moms, I finally discovered a solution that works!

Nature’s Miracle Orange-Oxy Stain and Odor Remover!

Yes, this is a pet store product, but the same stuff that breaks down enzymes in pet urine does wonders on the stuff my boys produce. I attacked our main level half bath the other day with Nature’s Miracle, and FINALLY, the pee smell has dissipated. The solution was able to get into the cracks and crevices of the floor and bottom of the toilet, taking care of all the ickiness that I couldn’t reach with my other cleaning supplies.

I almost jumped for joy….yes, it doesn’t take much to amuse me these days. I can now attack toddler potty training with newfound enthusiasm, no longer fearing the extra doses of pee that will be offered up to all surfaces in my bathrooms.

So, what has worked for you to get rid of ickiness left in the boys’ wake?

Seeking to fully live,

I’m participating in the Living Well Wednesdays LinkUp

Filed Under: Homemaking, Parenting Tagged With: cleaning, potty training

Conquering the Laundry Beast

June 22, 2011 By JulieBastuk 4 Comments

I hate laundry. I’ve moaned about it before on my blogs, and I’ve moaned about it away from the computer.

I don’t really mind putting laundry in the washing machine, but I hate every step after that, especially putting it away.

Really dumb, I know, and I can’t pinpoint why I hate it so much…..I think I have selective laziness regarding chores.

However, I have discovered the solution to my chronic laundry procrastination. In fact, because of my novel idea I have washed and put away almost all of the laundry in the house over the past day, without huge piles of it making my spare bed disappear, or sitting in baskets long enough for my dogs to “accidentally” knock them over and then lay on the clean clothes.

My solution for the entire problem is, I must say, really forward thinking. I’ll probably get a book deal and be labeled the next great home manager.

And I know you’re dying to know how I conquered the great laundry beast in one fell swoop. Well, you’re in luck, I’m going to reveal my genius to you.

Wash small loads of only like things.

What? You can’t read it? OK, here it is again.

Wash small loads of only like things.

OK, OK….

Wash Small Loads of Like Things!

So not really all that novel, huh?

Be gracious with me, I didn’t leave the nest with abundant homemaking skills, and am still learning as I go. And sometimes, it takes me a while to catch on to the most obvious of things. My whole life, I may have separated laundry by likeness, but I still always attempted to stuff the washer with as much as possible, leaving me with a ginormous pile of laundry to put away every time the dryer buzzer went off. Did I mention I hate putting laundry away?

It finally occurred to me the other day to do small loads of like things that dry much faster and can literally be taken from the dryer, folded, and put away in five minutes. Somehow, doing things this way is so much more appealing than dumping an overflowing basket of clothes on my bed, separating, folding, and then putting them away over fifteen to twenty minutes. Inevitably, this fifteen to twenty minutes turns into a week of laundry getting scattered and wrinkled before it might possibly enter it’s designated home.

Surprisingly, my plan of washing more loads that are smaller is actually taking less time because I”m not having to run the dryer 2 or more cycles to get everything dry. I may be paying a bit more energy-wise with either the washer or dryer, but I think having a more relaxed, laundry-clutter-free home is worth the few extra dollars.

So stay tuned….I’ll most likely soon come up with another potentially life changing solution to a household dilemma that the rest of the homemaking world solved years ago and Penguin will be knocking down my doors to sign a publishing deal…..

Seeking to fully live,

I’m participating in the Living Well Wednesdays LinkUp

Filed Under: Homemaking Tagged With: laundry

The First World Guilt Factor

June 12, 2011 By JulieBastuk 4 Comments

I live in the United States, obviously one of the most well off countries in the world. And by this country’s standards, I’m pretty comfortable. We earn a good income, have more than enough “stuff”, and I’ve had many awesome opportunities in my life. On top of that, I’ve got a wonderful husband does a great job at providing, and three beautiful, healthy boys.

And some days I can feel SO guilty about it.who

I was riding my road bike the other day in the lovely Indiana farmland, counting my blessings, and enjoying the warm sunshine and exercise, thinking about how happy I was.

And guilt began to consume me, as it always does when I feel happy for very long.

Why did I get to be born in a prosperous country, where life is easier and options for leisure abound? Why did I get to live outside of poverty, go to college, have the good things that I have?

My entire life I have suffered from tremendous guilt over living in the first world….and I have always thought that maybe the guilt would subside if I gave everything away and moved into abject poverty with the majority of the world. Didn’t Jesus tell the rich young ruler to give away all of his possessions?

Fortunately, I have a great mentor, who walks closely with Jesus, who pointed out a few things that have helped change my perspective and lessen the load of guilt I carry. Just like anyone else, I certainly have areas in my life where I need to be more giving and less selfish, and more concerned about others, but not all of my rationale for my guilt has been Spirit guided and God centered.

First, Jesus told the rich young ruler to give away his riches because he knew the man’s heart. Having wealth isn’t in and of itself wrong, but how one feel’s about it in their heart and how it is used. Others throughout the New Testament obviously had money, such as Joseph of Arimethea, but they were never mentioned in a negative light. What is most important about the wealth we have is how we handle it, and whether or not it replaces God in our hearts. Do we let it slip through our hands to people in need, believing it is God’s money to be handled well, or do we grip it tightly, saying “Mine, mine, mine!!!”

Second, my understanding of the nature of God is a bit cloudy. I developed an unconcious belief that God was going to punish me for living in a country such as the US and having a relatively easy life thus far. Which is dumb logic….why would God get mad at me for something he himself did? He chose for me to be born in the US, to live in this time and culture, and follow him in whatever circumstances he placed me.. I had no choice in where I was going to be placed.

I also have trouble believing that God’s plan is going to work out. I know it will in my head, but when it comes down to it, in my heart I struggle. I see the hurting and victimized in the world, and struggle with believing that God can truly fix it all in the end. I have always felt the need to do a sort of penance to the rest of the world, to make up for the nice life that I’ve had so far. Basically what it comes down to is me putting God in the courtroom and acting as a judge toward him, accusing him of not being able to work things for the good.

Ultimately, what my heart needs is more time with Jesus, allowing him to reveal more and more about his nature. And, as my mentor advised, I don’t need to seek out more suffering. There will be suffering enough in life as it is. Seeking out more suffering to make myself feel better certainly isn’t going to make me more holy in God’s eyes. He asks me to receive what he sends my way, and do with it what he asks, giving him all the glory. Nothing more is required of me.

Seeking to fully live,

Filed Under: Christian Living, Depression/Anxiety, World Events Tagged With: guilt, moeny

Introducing Chores to Your Children

June 9, 2011 By JulieBastuk Leave a Comment

I’m concerned that a vast majority of kids in the US are really lacking in a sense of responsibility, work ethic, and the satisfaction that comes with doing a job well. So many of them will leave home with hardly any life skills, and will then have to suffer tough consequences and have to learn on the fly lessons that they didn’t receive from their parents, for whatever reason.

I believe it all starts with working with children when they are young, when work is still play to them, and they enjoy working alongside Mommy and Daddy. They are little sponges that want to soak up everything. Granted, sometimes it is easier to send them off to play by themselves and get the housework or whatever needs to be done by myself, but resorting to this on a regular basis is doing them a disservice.

Children aren’t given to us by God as playthings, entertainment, or a means to fill a love and affection void in our lives. We are meant to be stewards of them, understanding that they belong to God and have simply been entrusted to us for a short while. This sort of perspective on raising children makes me take parenting much more seriously.

I have been pretty amazed at the capabilities of my boys, even at the young age of two….they can do alot more than I used to give them credit for. I have gradually been adding and teaching tasks to my four year old and have been thrilled to see the pride and excitement he has when he knows he has done a good job helping me. My two year old is beginning to display more and more signs of willingness to help, too, especially when he is praised for a job well done.

Just a short list of tasks my four year old can complete or do with my help;

1. Make his bed

2. Use a stic-vac to clean the wood floors.

3. Put hangers on his shirts and hang them up/ fold blankets, towels, and rags

4. Wipe down his bathroom with disinfecting wipes

5. Wash the bottom half of the van.

6. Help sort laundry by colors.

7. Make sandwiches by himself, and make scrambled eggs and use the toaster with a little help from Mommy.

8. Clean the toy room

9. Help pick up the yard.

10. Wash plastic dishes and clear the table.

And many more….

My two year old can:

1. Fetch diapers and wipes

2. Put trash in the garbage can

3. Help put away toys

4. Put blankets and pillows on his bed, dirty clothes in the laundry basket, and help tidy his room.

5. Put his used dishes in the sink.

6. Gather up his books and take them to the boys’ bookshelf.

7. Help put hangers on his shirts and put his pants and shorts in dresser drawers.

Both boys also help me with the laundry, putting clothes in the washer and then transferring them to the dryer.

Sometimes chores take longer when I bring in the boys, but it is worth it, especially when I know that they are learning basic skills that will help them throughout life. I am their mom, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to spend all of my time that they live in my house picking up after them, entertaining them, and requiring nothing of them. They most likely will get married when they grow up, but before that I want them to be able to take care of themselves as well as be capable and sensitive to help their future wives. It’s best to start now while they want to help, instead of waiting until they are no longer interested in learning.

Here is a basic example of Xander’s summer chore chart:

summer2011 chore list

Seeking to fully live,

Filed Under: Homemaking, Parenting Tagged With: Children, chores

Leaving

June 7, 2011 By JulieBastuk 1 Comment

“Better watch those boys,” she always says. “Bad people tend to snatch up the blond haired, blue-eyed kids.”

I cringe every time my mom reminds me of this…I prefer to believe that with my watchful eyes and careful parenting my boys will be by my side forever.

But the truth is, they are already leaving me….not being forcefully taken by someone, but moving away from me of their own accord, in a natural progression.

How is it that Xander is already four and has finished a year of preschool? Little Grahamy is two and can already say his ABC’s and count to 15? And Landon, the baby, is not so little any more at 5 months old?

Studies show that a child’s personality and temperament and behaviors are basically set by the time they reach 7 years old. I have become very aware of just how little time left I have to cement certain things into Xander, and the task of parenting becomes daunting when I think of all the things they need to know before I send them off into the world….there just doesn’t seem to be enough time!

Both of my older boys have discovered girls already, and are infatuated with the little eight year old neighbor girl….daily they stand at the door, wave, and say “Hiiiiiiiii Shelby, hiiiiii Shelby!”, and both do their best to impress her with their little boy antics. I realize that in ten or so years, I won’t be the “cool” girl in their lives anymore, and might not hear any longer on a regular basis that I’m the bestest mommy in the whole world.

I don’t relish the idea of them leaving…I don’t want to lose the cuddles, the kisses, the tickles, and the childish innocence they have. Still, leaving is inevitable, and I’m OK with it as long as they leave me in such a way that they move closer and closer to Jesus. I’m content if they leave being my soft, snuggly little boys to turn into devoted followers of Jesus, strong leaders of their families, advocates for the hurting, poor, and forgotten. They have never really belonged to me anyway…I asked God for them in the very beginning and gave them right back to him when they were born….sometimes I forget this and think they are just mine.

In the end, if they learn to love Jesus well, they won’t ever really be leaving. They will just be moving away for a while to do what He asks of them, and I’ll have them forever.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: boys